Mom Independently Published Rejected Children's Books (Funny Books for Adults)- Mom Likes To Be Choked

Mom Likes to be Choked: Guide to Everyday KinksA cheerful bedtime story for adults who grew up, got weird, and stayed that way.Let's be honest, life is hard, bills are overdue, and your childhood dreams died the moment you stepped into your first cubicle. So why not treat yourself (or some poor jerk you call a friend) to a colourful, crass, and unapologetically kinky parody book that tackles the birds and the butt-plugs of modern-day kink culture?"Mom Likes to be Choked: Guide to Everyday Kinks" is the perfect gift for people who are equal parts dirty-minded and dead inside. Written in the sugary sweet cadence of a children's book, but with very adult themes, this illustrated guide walks you through everything from spanking and ropes to foot worship and gas masks (because of course it does).Presented by a cast of wide-eyed cartoon animals who have clearly seen some things, this book is less about educating and more about escalating. It doesn't pull punches, it pulls hair (with consent, obviously).Inside these pages, you'll find: - Cute animals doing filthy things in a delightfully innocent art style- Rhyming stanzas that would make a kindergarten teacher choke on their pearls- A cynical but strangely wholesome celebration of kink, consent, and how deeply weird adulthood has becomePerfect for: - The friend who overshares at brunch- Your favorite sex-positive coworker (you know the one)- A bachelorette party that got wildly out of hand- Couples therapy gone rogue- A passive-aggressive gift for your prudish aunt- Anyone who's too jaded for Hallmark cards and too pervy for JesusIs it educational? Maybe a little. Is it safe for work? Absolutely not. Will it make you laugh so hard you spit out your lukewarm boxed wine? We hope so. But most importantly, this book reminds you that we're all a little twisted, and that's okay. (Unless you're into feet. Then it's definitely not okay. Just kidding. Mostly.)So grab a copy, gift it to a friend, or leave it on your coffee table for guests to question your taste in literature. It's a cringe-inducing, boundary-blurring, eye-roll-inducing celebration of what makes us... well, not boring.Because if you're going to be unhinged, you might as well rhyme about it.